Oh goodness gracious…how I LOVVVVVVEEEE weddings. *sarcasm* Are you kidding me, I can’t stand them. So the wedding reception started at 5pm. We got their shortly after. When we entered the lobby there were so many damn people. Some we know, others we didn’t because they were on the groom’s side. So we went ahead and had to go congratulate the wedding party as they stand in a stupid row. Once that was done we figured out where we were going to sit by getting a card with our family name on with a table number. Ours was 4.

So we head into the dinner area, where by the way, not many people were sitting yet because most were in the lobby drinking. I was there shortly after because heck, it was OPEN BAR!!!!! Sweeeeeeettttt!! Anyways back to my story. My mom asks one of her cousins where table 4 was. She was like you can’t be sitting at table 4, because I know for a fact I am. Clearly, it made sense since she was in fact the aunt to the bride, and I also noticed my aunts sitting near table 40 something. So she went to check while we waited. We ended up being table 43…they fucked up on the card numbers.

The damn wedding was really awkward and was different from a traditional Portuguese wedding (the groom is Italian while the bride is Portuguese). Anyways, they ended up doing the first dances BEFORE anyone ate. I was like WTF, isn’t that suppose to come after the dinner. It was seriously all backwards. To make a long story short, there was 500+ people there. They had to use three huge halls to fit everyone in. The food was shitty. Sorry, I don’t want to eat lasagna and other kinds of pasta. Where on earth are the damn pieces of yummy fish with the rice, plus the beef with the small potatos, and the soup!!!?? (Every Portuguese person knows what I mean)…THERE WAS NONE OF THAT!!!!!!! It was more Italian than Portuguese. Sorry since I don’t mean to diss Italians, but I CANNOT eat that food they serve at weddings. It was NASTY!! and completely different than what a Portuguese wedding is like. Plus the dessert…disgusting…I was ready to gag.

At midnight is when they have the buffet table, and I didn’t even stay for that because I was so turned off. I asked my mom to drive me home at 10pm. She did, as well as my sisters too. It was just so damn boring and nasty ass food. Remind me again why I agreed to go??? Oh ya, I HAD TO! Fuck that…NEVER AGAIN man. Seriously, I’d rather hit a bar and pay for my drinks, then hit a wedding with nasty food. The only think that was good was the open bar. Yummmm “sex on the beach”…..I so want more right now!!

Bottom Line — I’m never attending a wedding again (except for my sisters of course)…or any other huge gathering.